Cheater cheater pumpkin eater!

Where did we leave off? Oh, right, I had just gotten back to Midwestern City from Chicago and figured that I wouldn't be kissing anyone for a while. Two days later, I was making babies on the dance floor with my salsa instructor, then exploring his oral cavity (mouth, people, mouth!), then learning that he has a live-in girlfriend.

I learned that lesson when I showed up to his house the next night for a lil pre-party before heading out for more dancing, and his girlfriend opened the door. His girlfriend who is in my salsa class--that he instructs--by the way. Yup. We did the whole, "Oh, hiiiiiii!' and hug thing, and all I could think about was, "Thank the good Lord in whom I don't believe that I brought a friend with me tonight!" There was only one other dude there except for The Couple, so I was thanking TGLIWIDB double! Time to act normal. I walked over to him and said my usual hello, noting the slightest look of nervousness on Salsa Instructor's face as we greeted each other with a hug and a heeyyyy.

A minute of small talk goes by, and I wander into the living room where there's some art on the wall. "Who's the artist?," I ask teasingly, since it's obviously an amateur. Girlfriend: "My kids. There's a picture of them over there." At this point I'm still not tuned into the fact that they are living together; after all, she was nowhere to be seen the night before when we were sipping cocktails at his place between party spots. I am, however, thinking, "Shit, dude, this is pretty goddamn serious if you have pictures ny her kids up on your wall!" 

We make our way over to the couch, and the four of us -- as in, me, my friend, Girlfriend, and random dude -- chat. Salsa Instructor is conspicuously absent. Keeping himself busy in the kitchen, he is. Those snacks that I brought over should not have taken that long to unpack, but whatever. He comes to serve the snacks, but right back out he goes to attend to nothing in the kitchen. He's there (out of sight) doing I don't know what.....for the next 45 minutes? hour? A long fucking time. 

In the meantime, I'm learning all sorts of things! They're going to Indonesia together in a couple of months, and guess what -- her kids are coming along, too! Aw, what a nice, big, happy family! 

WTF, dude? I mean, I'm not into the guy....although I do want to bone him. But I don't want to create enemies in this place where I moved just a year ago. And I'm wondering if he's told her, since she keeps making references to "The crazy night that you guys had last night!" "Yeah, it was fun!", I play along. Whatever.

More people show up. He enters the room, finally. He's at least acting normal. 

I get drunk. I don't mean to, but I do. I shit talk Girlfriend's dancing skills to my friend. I take off my jacket and prance around in a skimpy tank top with my zebra bra straps showing. I talk to him one-on-one a couple of times, and a couple of times Girlfriend comes over to interrupt. 

I don't want to have "a talk" with him. There's really no need. But I do want to communicate, "Dude, I got the message. You've got a girl. That's fine. We barely got to second base anyways. I'm not going to out you. And you better act the fuck cool and not turn awkward on me, because I intend to continue talking salsa lessons from you." I think I communicated that effectively. At least I hope I did.

So the night is a fun one. We end up staying at his place instead of going out to the place we had planned. My friend and I end up at another bar. I make out with another dude and we get yelled at by the bouncer to get out of the staircase. The next morning I put myself into self-imposed makeout slut rehab.

Oh, did I mention that since then all I can think about is sleeping with Salsa Instructor? Yeah. I want it. Badly.