Breaking the news part deux

I said I wanted at least one jaw to drop. I didn't have to wait for long.

[A transcript of a Skype chat with a friend back home, trying to arrange a time to speak.]

Me: We should chat soon.
Friend: I can later this week. Tonight is the night I watch Bachelor Pad (a 3 hr show). lol
Me: Three fricken hours?! Oh my. Okay, I'll catch you later this week. There's some news I ought to share with you, though I'm sure you've already heard.
Friend: I haven't heard anything?!
Me: Well then, we'll have much to talk about.
Friend: Are you going to say another proposal? lol [Our mutual best friend got engaged this summer.]
Me: [I cringe - ouch!] No, m'dear. I'd rather tell you over the phone.
Friend: Hmmm. This sounds important. I wanna know!! I think ur engaged lol.
Me: You'll laugh when I tell you, then. I'm certainly not engaged.